Transferable (?) Love

This past weekend, Hannah and I took a trip to Nashville.

I simply wanted to get out of Chicago for a bit. Hannah wanted to see her mama and introduce me to Old Hickory, Tennessee.

We had fun. I met Hannah's grandparents and they fed me an excellent meal (which included platanos maduros and homemade flan).

 I saw Mandy again--she is a friend of Hannah's who I met a little over a month ago when she visited Chicago. In the company of her mother, sister, best friend, and mother's friend, I watched Hannah get her 7^th tattoo. I saw the sights of Nashville and had several meaningful conversations with my gal. It was good.

The most significant part of the weekend, however, was that I was well- loved by Hannah's family and friends and I knew I was receiving this love mainly because Hannah is loved. I couldn't help but meditate on this.

Because Hannah’s mother and sister love her so much, they were happy to act as my tour guides, to drive me to the At&t store when my phone stopped working, to fix me tea in the morning before church, and to call me “honey.”  

Because Mandy and her husband, Rocky love Hannah so much, they were happy to welcome me into their home and to have me play with their children (one of whom complimented my braids endlessly, gave me kisses, told me she was falling in love with me, and declared that we were going to get married). Mandy greeted me like an old friend. Rocky shared an amazing dessert with me.

That they all showed me so much love (and there were many more examples of this than I will list) because Hannah values me and they love Hannah was just remarkable to me. It was important because their love trumped their lack of wholehearted approval of or comfort with my relationship with Hannah.

And as I write this I’m thinking that it was all very Kingdom-like and a good example for me. I should be more intentional about loving people well, regardless of whether I approve of or agree with them, taking the fact that they are very loved by God (who I love) as reason enough. I've frequently stated/ communicated with others that my reason for believing that everyone deserves to receive dignity and justice, to have their voices heard, and to just be treated well is because everyone is made in God’s image. This makes each person as equally and infinitely valuable as the other. Too often that’s just an abstract idea--one that I like to discuss but can forget to practice in my day to day living. This weekend was a good reminder to love for the sake of Love and a beautiful illustration of how to do just that.  

Thank you Abuelos de Hannah, Michelle, Renee, Rachel, Stella, Mandy, Rocky, Dave, and Andrea for teaching me well this weekend.

Mid-February Wellness

I sat down a few days ago to write a detailed food update. I couldn't do it. I literally tried for hours and could only produce 2 incoherent paragraphs. I haven't discussed food here since the beginning of November so a large part of me wants to tell you every little detail about what I've been eating. But for some reason, my brain can't make it happen! So I'll  just say that from November to now I've exercised about 4 times and I've been eating the unhealthiest that I have in about a year and a half--mainly junk food, lots of sugar, lots of refined carbs, lots of alcohol. Ironically, I've lost about 5 pounds on this "diet" and am the smallest I've been since high school. Not ironically, I've had the stomach flu and 3 colds during this time-- the final cold lasted a whopping 5 weeks.

Yech.

I am amused that I managed to lose weight while eating 90% junk and not exercising. I've learned that, for me, the quantity of food consumed has a more significant impact on my weight than the quality of food consumed. Although I scarfed down junk for the past couple of months, I ate sporadically. On most days, due to poor decision making and the lack of an appetite, energy, interest and/ or time, I only ate one or two meals. And so my tummy shrank, and my pants got baggy...and my immune system went on vacation. I had a physical about a week and a half ago and learned that I had borderline low blood pressure. This was also funny to me considering the high sodium content of everything I'd been eating for the past few months. Less funny, however, was that my iron levels were low and that I basically had no Vitamin D in my body! Ok--I exaggerate. My levels were just abysmally low at 19 (according to my doctor, 30 is the adequate level) !

But good news:

Last week's sole green smoothie

I've come to a place where I again have both the desire to eat well, and some of the [mental and physical] energy I need to make that happen. I planned to make February my month to focus on wellness, or something, but we're almost half way through the month, and I've still been eating junk, averaging 3 hours of sleep a night, not exercising, and drinking too much [liquor]. I'm not stressing about it though. Over the past couple months I've really realized that I'm not mentally at the place where trying to be a stickler about food will be beneficial to me. . It's been hard for me to admit, but I have "deeper" things to work on before I'll be able to successfully follow a "strict" food regimen.

So I have some simple daily goals (SDG's--you know you like that) for now:

1. get 7 hours of sleep
2. do 20 minutes of exercise  (not including my walks to and from work)
3. drink a green smoothie and eat a serving of steamed veggies
4.  have 30 minutes of communion with God in whatever form seems best that day
5. journal
6. drink 8 cups of water

A list of 6 things might seem too long, but I have at least 10 other things I want to add. So I am pleased with myself for committing to only 6.

And these are foundational. I need rest, veggies, and water. I need to move. I need God and I need to have sorted thoughts and feelings. I don't think I'll be able to make any other long-term positive changes in my life until those 6 things are standard.

I'll start tonight with a green smoothie and 7 hours of sleep. This is going to go amazingly well.

Navel-Gazing

I’ve been really very busy.  So…

I’ve been eating shitty food and giving my conscience the middle finger.

I’ve been checked out for a little while—caught up in my head but not aware of what’s been going on in my spirit. I’ve been having fun but dealing with this lingering unease. I’ve been afraid.

 

I’ve been subsisting on Mumford and Sons. I’ve been dying to change bad habits.

I’ve been working full days.

I’ve been thinking of God as someone I used to know.  I’ve been longing for courage. I’ve been hating people. I’ve been eschewing thoughts of “better.”

I’ve been tired of all of this.

But…I’m on a mini vacation now. And I’m putting myself back together.  And a new year’s approaching.  And I plan on living it better.

So, I'll be back soon with relevant material :).

Just in case you were wondering where I've been...

Simple Sweet Potato Pie--Paleo and Vegan

I like to bring separate worlds together. Twilight and Harry potter? I love both! Christian and Feminist? Right here, baby. Paleo and Vegan? We can make it work!  I’m on the hunt for recipes that fit in both worlds. I’ve come up with a few simple ones myself and found a couple of others. I am excited to share them on this blog! Here is one to startJ.

Simple Paleo Vegan Sweet Potato Pie

Crust
1/3 cup raw macadamia nuts and raw cashews
4 dates

Filling

½ can of sweet potato puree

¼ tsp cinnamon
1/8 tsp nutmeg
1/8 tsp ground ginger

Directions

1.       To make the crust put the nuts and dates in a food processor and process until the mixture is sticky and clumps together.

2.       Press mixture into small pie pan ( I used a  2 cup circular Pyrex container  b/c I didn’t have pie pans)

3.       Whisk sweet potato pie puree with spices, scoop onto crust, and spread evenly.

4.       Bake at 350 degrees until sweet potato starts to brown (about 15 minutes?)

5.       Let cool and stick in the fridge for about half an hour so that it’ll be nice and firm.

6.       EAT IT!!

 

I decided to make this because I used half a can of sweet potato puree to make salmon cakes and didn’t know what to do with the remaining bit. Pie seemed like a good choice! I definitely broke a Whole30 rule—they tell you not to recreate desserts using Paleo approved ingredients—but ah well. I think this was basically a meal. It had fruit (dates), a vegetable (sweet potato), healthy fats (raw nuts), and spices!  AND it was tiny and it still took me 3 days to eat.  So even though dates are high sugar and nuts are high fat, I used small amounts and ate small servings so it was definitely healthy. Let me know if you try to make this. I’ve only attempted this once so these might not be the best instructions. But it’s so simple I really don’t think you can go wrong!

Paleo Trial: Days 16-18

So....

Things have fallen apart. The collapse started slowly with the popcorn and Hot Tamales, peaked on Halloween when my roommates and I had a huge bucket of candy and no trick-or-treaters (you figure out what happened), and is now tapering off. Sigh. Now, I definitely don't think I'll be able to tell just how beneficial the Paleo diet was or could have been for me. I'm going to post what I ate on Days 16, 17, and 18. I'm currently on day 22. We will call days 19-21 the "lost days" and I won't talk about them. The shame is too great.  We'll see if I can at least finish strong and do Paleo really well from days 23-30. I think I am over it though. This was exciting at first but I really don't think it's something that I can do all day every day. Quality, cruelty free meat is just too much for my budget! It really stresses me out--buying pricey meat and worrying about not having enough of it when I have so many different kinds of beans sitting in my pantry (I have a post coming up about this)!! AND it's also kind of boring. Beef, chicken, fish, beef chicken fish, beefchickenfish, maybe lamb, sometimes goat, a little pork, beefchickenfish, turkey. Boiled egg, scrambled egg, poached egg, omlette. Repeat.  LOL. OK...I am being completely unfair. There are tons of ways to get creative with your meat (and I absolutely love ground beef, pork, and salmon--grass fed, wild). But I just don't like preparing meat as much as I like making plant-based meals. I think a big part of that is that I'm still battling with how I feel about eating meat regularly.  On a good note though, one of my main fears has been put to rest--eating a lot of meat will not automatically make you constipated! The fiber from the fruits, veggies, nuts, and seeds has proven to be sufficient for my digestive system. Yay for being regular!

Day 16

Meal 1
I could do better
Green tea  (w/ a bit of honey and stevia!)
Banana
Apple
Almond pumpkin bars made by paleo friend at church
Meal 2

Bbq pork
Lettuce
Orange
Meal 3

Chicken leg and thigh
Roasted onions
Grapes
Day 17
Meal 1

I often end up eating breakfast at work b/c I'm always running late!

1 serving green smoothie- 2 cups chard, ¼ raw soaked almonds, 2 tbs ground flaxseed soaked overnight, 1 apple, 1 frozen banana, ½ avocado, water to blend. Yum.
Omlette-2 eggs, onions, nutritional yeast and a bit of sea salt
Snack
1 cup grapes
Meal 2

2 cups red leaf lettuce
Roasted Chicken breast
½ avocado
Snack
¼ cup raisins
¼ cup raw cashews
Peppermint tea
1 gala apple
Post work out meal
2^nd serving green smoothie
Meal 3

I loved this meal so much!

6 oz wild Alaskan salmon: broiled with an amazing honey-mustard glaze!
1 baked acorn squash with coconut butter and sea salt (so good!)
2/3 cup steamed mixed veggies
Day 18
Meal 1
Green Smoothie- 2 cups tastoi, ½ avocado, 1 gala apple, 1 banana, ¼  cup raw almonds, soaked, water to blend.
Omlette from 3 eggs and ½ a large yellow onion
Snack
½ cup grapes
¼ cup raisins and handful of raw walnuts
Meal 2
Roasted chicken
1/5 cups red leaf lettuce
½ avocado
Snack
Banana
Meal 3
Second serving  green smoothie

I love ground beef. Made some  for tomorrow’s meals and I just love that kind of still raw bloody beef taste it has. Mm.


I decided to leave my thoughts about ground beef unedited. Gross right? But so true. Yum.

Quickie: Jillian Michaels Talks Paleo

Hi friends!

Just wanted to share this very quick video of Jillian Michaels (love. her.)  discussing her opinion of the Paleo diet. I really like her take on it and on different diets in general! She basically says to use common sense and eat whole real foods and not fake crap and you'll ultimately be fine! Have a looksie!

Isn't she great?!

Paleo Trial: Days 13-15

Ok,

I'm just going to come right out and confess. On Saturday night (day 15) I ate popcorn and Hot Tamales (the candy)!!! My roommates and I watched The Shining, in honor of Halloween weekend and those were our movie watching snacks. The good news is that the popcorn was fairly healthy since we (well, they) popped it from the original kernel, in a pot w/ olive oil (as opposed to the not so healthy microwave variety). My body definitely reacted though. Within 5 minutes I was super bloated! The bloating lasted for hours, in fact I was still bloated when I went to sleep and felt pretty uncomfortable when I woke up the next morning.  And that morning, Sunday, I put a bit of raw honey and stevia in my tea! And after church on Sunday I had a little pumpkin ball thingy that a friend of mine made, the ingredients of which included maple syrup, rolled oats, and sugar. AND that same friend gave me a few slices of a pumpkin loaf she'd made the previous evening. The loaf was made from almond flour and thus completely grain free and "essentially" paleo-friendly but there were maple syrup and chocolate chips in it! Then I had some more Hot Tamales on Sunday night because the huge bag was in our living room and it was literally calling out to me. Ok, not literally, but still. Overall, I don't feel bad about my minor Paleo deviance. According to the Whole30 people I technically need to start the 30 day trial over because I interfered with my body's resetting process. According to Loren Cordain (author of The Paleo Diet), however, everything is alright, I've just used up my "open meals" for the week (although those things don't qualify as "meals" really) and I'll always be fine as long as the majority of the food I eat is strictly Paleo! So. I am ok. I think I am going to tack an additonal 2 days on to my trial though to make up for Saturday and Sunday.

Day 13

Meal 1
Hot water w/ lemon
Green smoothie #3 "Mangolicious Strawberry-Mint" -strawberry, mango, mizuna, mint, water, ground flax, cinnamon, soaked almonds, dash of sea salt. I'd give this one a 6. Again, just not sweet enough.
3 Salmon cakes
Snack
Jasmine green tea
Banana
Dried fig w/ a few raw macadamia nuts
 Meal 2
Chicken breast
1 cup lettuce
½ avocado
An orange
Snack
2 figs
Handful of macadamia nuts
Salmon cake
Meal 3

Garlic Shrimp  (I cooked an entire bag of frozen shrimp and ate nearly ¾ of it in one go!!)
1 cup Russian kale sautéed with olive oil and garlic
Small piece of paleo sweet potato pie
Peppermint tea
Day 14
Meal 1
Hot water w/lemon
Green tea w/ a touch of raw honey (gasp I know I cheated)
banana
Green smoothie #6 “Vanilla Chai” smoothie- 2 cups greens (mix of kale, mizuna,and  chard), figs, soaked chia gel, soaked almond, soaked sunflower seeds, avocado, cinnamon, nutmeg, vanilla extract, dash of sea salt, ice....meh. I guess i'd give it a 6.5/7. I was impressed that you couldn't taste the greens. And I suppose it did taste "chai"-ish. I just didn't like it a whole lot overall.
leftover broiled garlic shrimp
Snack
1 fuji apple
Meal 2
2 cups steamed cauliflower
1.5 Salmon cakes
2 small clementine oranges
Small piece of paleo- friendly sweet potato pie
Meal 3

Grilled chicken salad from Leonas w/ Italian dressing. I should have learned my lesson about dressings by now. I doubt it was Paleo approved. I felt very allergy-y after eating it. I need to make my own dressing
My salad came with an amazing looking loaf of bread. I nearly cried b/c I wanted to eat it so badly. I gave it to my roommate though. Sigh. The no bread thing is just getting harder and harder.
Day 15
Meal 1
Green smoothie #7 "Choc-Chai Smoothie" -2 cups mizuna, soaked sunflower seeds, soaked almonds,  water,  soaked chia gel, avocado, figs, dates, cacao powder, ccinnamon, nutmeg, vanilla, dash of sea salt. Again, impressed by the no-greens taste but wasn't a big fan over all. 6.5/7.
Meal 2

Left over Leona's Salad mix
Can of sardines ( I made a sardine salad!)
Roasted red onion
Rest of paleo sweet potato pie
Snack

I roasted a whole chicken on my own! I need practice lol.

2 tiny roasted chicken wings (this was unintentional. I was cutting/tearing my roast chicken into pieces and the next thing I knew there was a tiny, crispy chicken wing in my hand and i thought to myself "I can either put this in the container or just eat this little thing right now!" I chose the latter. Same story for the 2nd wing.
Apple,
Small taste bites of bbq country style pork ribs
Meal 3

Handful of grapes
slow cooked bbq country style pork ribs (my first time cooking pork. HUGE success :D)
Salad (STILL had leftover salad from Leona's)
Banana
Peppermint tea

Oemmgee- popcorn and hot tamales, my “open meal” while watching a movie with my roommates….super bloated. FOR HOURS.  Still bloated as I go to sleep typing this.

 

So I am behind on updating. As I type this I've just completed day 18. I'll share what I ate days 16-18 tomorrow! I must say I don't know what I'm currently making of ths diet. The novelty has worn off some and I miss being an aspiring vegan. More on that later, though. Who knows, I might feel differently in another 2 weeks!